FoGR: The Louis XIV Years - The Oxford Doubles 2014
Buccaneer vs Louis XIV French
Game 1 Buccaneer vs Later Danish
Game 2 Buccaneer vs Quing Chinese
Game 3 Buccaneer vs Louis XIV French
Game 4 Buccaneer vs Later Spanish
Well well well, Me Hearties! Oxford for the Doubles on an autumnal Sunday morning. The army was a repeat of last year, and this time the opponent was as well as the Harleymeister and his untrustworthy totem Mad Jack Hairy McPaddy faced myself and Mr Allen in a game that took place as the clocks turned back, which was a perfect time for Pirates!
This would be a test indeed for the Pirate theory of surviving mounted impact through rear support and judicious placement of generals, however before the combat e'en started much would depend on the fall of the terrain, and whether there was a prospect of our brave lads narrowing the table at all - this in practice meant taking the very difficult decision not to even try and deploy the ship = Arrrrgggghh, the Scallywags!
Pictures of Pirates from the Photo Directory
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What's a-hoistin' the Jolly Roger here then?
The Louis XIV have in less skilled hands been seen as an army of sub-Swedish-quality attacking infantry, but here it was transformed into a wall of horseflesh, supported by copious amounts of dragoons and an artillery park to make Napoleon tremble. This irreligius tactic has now almost led to a change in the rules, but for this event the modification was not in play meaning the tactic du jour would again be in action
Thar she blows! The terrain had not been totally unkind to our Band O'Hearties - a steep hill in the middle of the enemy deployment zone, and some other small mangrove plantations dotted here and there on the mainly sandy beach on which we were washed up.
The game began with the French racing forwards on the flank where they felt they had the advantage (the one that Alasadair was playing on). As our band O'Hearties braced to receive the shock on the right, in the middle the Pirates pushed on in the face of almost no opposition save for an advancing unit of rather unlikely Superior carbine armed horse, who no doubt hoped to combine with the French artillery and some of the 5 units of enemy dragoons intending to zero in and pick on the medium foot in the open Pirate units.
The rougher the seas, the smoother we sail. Ahoy! On the far left a rare photo record demonstrates a scene rarer than when a mermaid dances a hornpipe under the light of a solar eclipse - Mad Jack McPaddy has been given some troops to play with by his master, and is already in trouble as the his units of French Dragoons have become the target of a concerted attack by our band O'Hearties - all units count the same, so overwhelming these is good value indeed.
How does a pirate know what he is going to do today?
He checks his itinerARRRRRY!
Splice the mainbrace! Our band O'Hearties left flank is far stronger than the French had expected, and heavy fire is raining on the dragoons.
Arrrr! These men a being scallywaggin' like a mutinous giant squid, and as they wriggled as if on a hook in the middle the inevitable was bowed to and the first Pirate unit, unable to stand up to the weight of incoming fire from 4 Heavy Guns and 4 Superior Carbines broke and fled. The outcome was not unexpected, and fortunately only one of the lowest-value Pirate units was broken (Average Musket Sword in a 6-pack) but still it was a problem our band O'Hearties would have preferred not to have to face. Their desparate rush had made it to the rough terrain, but there was a hige question as to whether they could advance all the way to the enemy artillery park.
Our band O'Hearties on the left had forced the enemy Dragoons to flee like startled haddock ! The big empty space lay in front of the pirates as Paddy conjured with what to do with the three units he had been permitted to play with.
But by now our band o'hearties had managed to assemble quite a force to sit on the decks of the terrain-shaped aircraft carriers of safety in the wild and empty seas of the horse-blown plains. A big stack of units mutually supporting and led by the Great Commander were now ready to have a charge at the soft underbelly of the French army, and their flanks were reasonably well anchored, by a steep hill or by being in the threat range of a couple of units hiding in the mangrove plantation.
Jack Black on Piracy
Arrr! Mad Jack McPaddy faffed as ineffectually as someone for whom lace sleeves are seen as a practical accoutrement to a military uniform.
This was it! The first pair of mounted charged piled in onto the front of the Pirate units - the Pirates had Generals, weight of numbers and even their Superior unit in play - the challenge was huge, but they could be set up no better than this.
And after Impact the crumbs of advantage were still on the table, and were being picked up by the jack sparrows of opportunity on the Pirate side of the table. One unit DISR in exchange for a dead horse base - not too bad, and now the sword-based overlaps of the Pirates would surely start to tell on the French horse.
What can I spie through me spyglass here then?
The French Horse on the Pirate right, following up on the opportunity created by their artillery park have smashed into the front of the Pirate army, but so far things are holding firm. The Pirates are also putting plenty of pressure on the thinkly defended French right and there is a real possibility the Pirates may yet make it to the artillery park.
Yo Ho Ho ! Mixed fortunes all round, as the Superior Pirate unit drops to FRAGGED but one of the rench horse units is now DISR and down to just 2 bases. The loss of the Superior pirates would be a big hole, but the Pirates have rear support to deal with it - although the French also have another wave of horse ready to attack. Cheered on by both the Great Commander and ample rear support, nothing could be better prepared for our band O'Hearties to do their dastardly worst to the waiting Frenchmen - just some fortitude and this still represented a big chance to turn the tables and gain revenge for the last game….
Pirate Ships in action
And the very next round was an absolute shambles. Against the FRAGGED horse both units conspired to roll a massive set of skulls (ones) and drop cohesin and shed bases. The game now had a rather different complexion, ( more akin to that of Mad Jack Mc Paddy... )
Who is a pirate's favorite actor?
Peter Sarrrrrrsgaarrrrrrd!!
Likewise in the other combat, as the Superior Pirate unit broke and fled, racing long and allowing the French horse to pursue into the large Pirate unit in the Mangrove swamp - who promtly managed a double-drop of their own as they had seen their crewmates humbled already and wanted to show solidarity. A rather traumatic turn as the Pirates shook under a hail of swordstrokes from the French Horse
On this wing things were going from really, really bad to much, much worse - the only saving grace was that the broken Pirates had fled a long, long way and had already outdistanced the French horse. A small mercy, but in a world of straw grabbing, you take what you can and are grateful (much like Mad Jack McPaddy and his force of 2 dragoon units and a 2-pack of LH).
The French were now scenting victory, and the Pirates were scenting an early lunch in a local pub - another French mounted unit piled into the rough terrain, looking to use its superiority to take down the already DISR Pirate units and smash the entire wing.
In the centre things were going from much, much worse to absolutely fricking atrocious - even more Pirates had broken, and burst through their rear support - the French Horse ploughed forward, catching the disorganised Pirates in the open and riding them down at will.
Shamed by their poor showing, some of the already-routed Pirates decided to rally from Broken and started to reform a line to allow themselves to be beaten again by the French.
Fortunately for our band o'hearties there was a bright spot on the table - a whole flank where the Pirates were doing well, largely due to the almost total lack of opposition they faced as Mad Jack McPaddys token forces fell back repeatedly like cowardly dogs.
The French continued to charge forwards, but by now the Pirates had started to reform and were filling the mangrove swamp - quite what they could expect to achieve in there was an interesting question which no-one on either side really had an answer to at this point in time.
In the centre a second wave of piracy had pulled itself together as the troops from the left had met up with those from the middle. This time they were much safer, sitting pretty on a steep hill and with much of the French horse either already spent or busy elsewhere hunting down survivors the odds looked a little better - as long as catastrophic dice could be avoided. The Great Commander urged his men forwards one more time...
What's rattlin' me cutlasses here then?
The Pirates have just about hung on and are enjoying a second wind - the losses have been severe, but with artillery and some non-engaged light foot units the Pirates can aford to lose almost all of their actual combat capable troops and so they have a second chance. The French have also suffered losses and their horse have pursued out of a coherent formation so only one unit now stands in the way of the second coming of the Pirate army.
The once-routed Mad Pirate unit has fully recovered, and snipes carefully out from between the mangrove brances at the French horse who caused it so much trouble whilst another pirate unit - who have never been in combat so far - shoot at even more French horse out of the other edge of the island of mangroves in which they wish to remain for as long as possible. The trees may be cake decorations but the situation they find themselves in could still leave a bad taste in the mouth
Aaarrhhh! All of the supporting cast of Pirates have been assembled, with bombers, musket-toting indian and a once-broken 50% dead Superior unit that has recovered to Fraggged. Suddenly the French horse realise that they have plenty more work to do as the Pirates find hitherto unseen reserves of fortitude and reorganise
The rougher the seas, the smoother we sail. Ahoy! On the left which has now become the centre there is finally some prooer shooting as the French horse take a pasting from the massed infantry supported by cannons stolen from their pirate ship. The ability of one French horse unit to defend their soft underbelly of infantry and guns looks a little more challenging now...they will need to soon survive an inevitable cutlass-swishing onslaught!
Splice the mainbrace! Our band O'Hearties have a massive moral victory as the French horse decide that the now-recovered Pirate formation is too scary to take on.. although maybe they are turning away to threaten the rear of the actual serious attack that is being prepared to hit their artillery park - who knows... but the revitalised and rallied Pirate army can now advance back into a big open space that this time has relatively few enemy horse in it.
What's floatin' me rowboat here then?
With 5 units of dragoons, 2 artillery, 2 cheap foote and a 2-pack of LH the French army is big - but the number of proper mounted units is still relatively small and once they are gone the French lack a little punch - and that is almost the situation they now find themselves in as the attrition of combat and shooting has knocked a few of them down. The recovery of many of the Pirate units has evened the odds and the French now have almost too much to do with their handful of strike units
The French suddenly found themselves exposed as the mounted unit in front of their foot was blown away. This was a proper combat being teed up - idea time for the scallywags to do their business... with none of these unmanly horses to get in the way..
Out of nowhere a couple of surviving horsemen captured our band O'Hearties artillery park! But with only 2 bases left, their ability to hold it was probably limited...
The battlefield was now almost unrecognisable from earlier - Pirates prepare to charge into French foote, French horse try and threaten their rear whilst being chased by the revitalised command who at last seem to have found their range when it comes to shooting enemy horsemen - the French unit has picked up a marker.
Pirate Ships
Arrr! With the French horse kinda stuck on the Pirate (or now uncontrolled) guns the Pirates 2 secret weapons - 3 Dragoons and 4 LF with bombs - converge on a target that they actually feel relatively confident about taking on. Have the French horse overreached themselves?
Yep, they have...
The French horse, realising the danger they are in, try to sneak off but fail their complex move test - the rather crap Pirate dragoon and LF combo moves in for the kill... .
Boom! The Mad Pirates charge into the rather surprised French infantry who have never actually been in combat before in their entire lives. The Great Commander leads the way in a charge which could rip the heart out of the backside of the French army if it goes well
It's all a bit mental, as French horse try to line up some charges before their infantry crumble or they themselves are caught in the rear - the concept of "lines" is now a thing of the past as the armies mill around in a maelstrom of random motion and threatened flanks. There is still time for a brave and heroic charge - and possibly a few brave and heroic stands - before the game even begins to look like it has been decided either way.
Vic Reeves on Pirates
The remaining French horse make their move, charging into 2 separate Pirate units as the Mad Pirates start to grind down the French infantry on the baseline. This is vital - as long as the 6-pack in the middle can stand up for a while, the rest of the Pirate army will surely have done enough to secure a victory and rip into the soft underbelly of the enemy formation? The Great Commander steps up to the plate to make sure their morale stays firm.
Our band O'Hearties are rocked on their heels - cohesion markers bloom across the table like scattered treasure, but these are coins which will only enrich the French treasury... still, DISR is not yet FRAGGED...
Splice the mainbrace! Another catastrophe! The 6-pack is blown away, and the by-now expanded French horse careen into the flank of the 8-pack of Mad Pirates, breaking them and routing them off table at exactly the same time as they themselves beat the French infantry before them! If only the 6-pack had survived another turn an 8-pack of Mad Pirates would have been rolling up the French rear... but it was not to be..
Our band O'Hearties do however wreak a spectacular revenge in the next turn, as the routed, then ralliied, 8-pack returns to the scene of it's original break, and charges the unit who initially broke it in the flank, destroying them in a furious charge! The Mad Pirates lurch forwards and find themselves threatening yet more French horse in the flank! The game may not yet be over...!
The French army is now ignominiously pinned into a tiny corner of the table, having been forced to retreat in tha face of a half-broken medium foot army, as none of the thousands of units of dragoons dare risk themselves in the face of the sheer firepower of the Pirates! What a turnup for the big book of Pirate Battle Stories!
Arrr! The last French unit launches a desparate charge - secure in the knowledge that their enormous back-catalogue of dragoons means their loss would not be terminal to the French army. This is a desparate end game for the Pirates, as the big unit lacks rear support.
The Mad Pirates did all they could to maximise the number of bases fighting at ++ in overlap, but the Determined Horse Frenchmen had more dice anyway...
However, in the end 8 dice beats 6, and the Mad Pirate unit falls to 50% losses and breaks - taking with it the hopes of the Pirate army. It is a defeat, but the French know they have been n a game like no other...
Click here for the report of the next game in this competition, or read on for the post match summaries from the Generals involved, as well as another episode of legendary expert analysis from Hannibal
Post Match Summary from the Buccaneer Commander
Oh, my timbers are still shivvering like jellyfish on an electric plate in the middle of a tropical hurricane after that wild ride of a game! My brave hearties gave their all here, and I think I could have asked them to do no more. Rallying units, returning to the fray, recapturing artillery, reducing the French to just one Horse unit and getting into their infantry - and of course a couple of rounds of horriffic dice to top it all off.
In the face of shuch a numerous and well-horsed opposition I am at a loss to see what else there was to do here - the support was in place, the generals were in combat, but nothing can take away the role of the bones once they were rolled - and with the enemy not conforming to the de facto rules amendment specifying that thou shalt have 6 foot for each gunne on table it became too hard to win - imagine if there had been 2 more foot units and perhaps one less mounted unit the game would have been very different. It was at least encouraging to see how the F-f-f-f-f-French felt compelled to retreat in the face of our advance as well, and not least it was enjoyable to see Mad Jack McPaddy being allowed to play with a couple of units too - much better than his usual role of manager of the baggage and keeper of the measuring sticks in order of ascending size.
Maybe one time in future we will succeed in these decisive combats, and our practice at getting all of our ducks into a duck-shaped row in the previous 2 debacles must come to fruition at some point in time. At least we have put this game, and this opponent behind us now and perhaps we can look for'ard in at least the next game to getting the dammned ship onto the table. That will at least make me a happy sailor ....
Hannibal's Post Match Analysis
Yarrr, I would surely be pardoned for robbing yer buggerin' teeth for the shame you have heaped upon all of the Spanish Main for this farrago of a disaster of a shambles masquerading as a battle plan!
Curse ye, and curse ye dice as well - there is no battle plan that depends upon good dice that is ever going to stand up in court once you are hauled to face yer crew - and once they have heard that yer plan was naught but good perparation and good dice I feel they will all be a'cryin "Plank that buggerin' dagger-brain!".
You have played this game before, and you adopted the same plan, and ended up with the same outcome. What is there to learn from this other than that if you repat the same mistakes a third time I'll be cuttin' off yer teeth an' feedin' it to me maggots.
There is one game left for you to salvage your reputation, but for me the choice is positively Sharesperian in whether you should be allowed to command in it - T' shark-chum or not t' shark-chum: tis th' question!
I hope that Sunday lunch will end up filling yer' belly and at the same time might put some more brains in yer pants, as another repeat performance will throw away all the points earned on Saturday, and if that swift fall from grace takes plaice then they surely be a keelhaulin' on yer powder chest like a malmsey-nosed shark in yer next battle !
Click here for the report of the next game in this competition
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Game 1 Buccaneer vs Later Danish
Game 2 Buccaneer vs Quing Chinese
Game 3 Buccaneer vs Louis XIV French
Game 4 Buccaneer vs Later Spanish
FoGR Rules for the Renaissance
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Battle Reports Pageloads to date.
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